


"guys, no sexting in the group chat."

by orphan_account



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: F/M, Lafayette is Lonely, M/M, modern day AU, texting au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-13
Updated: 2016-03-13
Packaged: 2018-05-22 22:13:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,560
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6095656
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>in which the revolutionary squad all have skype.</p>
            </blockquote>





	"guys, no sexting in the group chat."

**Author's Note:**

  * For [soulpunkk](https://archiveofourown.org/users/soulpunkk/gifts).



> once again for maddie, because i have no control.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> #truthful shit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i figured it out god bless

**baguette:** hey ham r u done w john yet i want my roommate back

**HAM THE MAN:** how u say no sweat

**baguette:** fuck u alex

nvm i’ll leave that for john

**HAM THE MAN:** watch your language, laf. and for your information, yes. i am done with john but you aren’t getting him back until tomorrow.

**baguette:** y

**HAM THE MAN:** is it really that hard to type out the word why?

america is falling to hell

nothing matters

EXCEPT FOR JOHN’S ASS 

**baguette:** im blocking ur number, ham.

~~~

**john:** hey alex have you seen my pants

**angel bf:** no? last i remember they were on the floor beside my bed sorry

**john:** so u HAVE seen them. okay.

**angel bf:** hey will you come back to bed  it’s cold and youre a giant space heater.

**john:** i guess but i have to go home soon

**angel bf:** i told laf you’d be staying the night with me :(

**john:** im leading the minimum wage thing tonight. i’ll be back when you wake up later. okay?

**angel bf:** but

i’m gonna miss you

i’m even clingier when im sick

**john:** i know, alex. but icommittedd to this thing so i have to do it.

**angel bf** : fine okay bring me back food

**john:** i love you and cherish you but youre sick so go the FUCK to sleep alexander.

**angel bf:** you sure know how to make a guys heart melt.

**john :** sleep, alex. get better so we can have all sorts of mind blowing sex.

~~~~

**horsefucker <3** : hey eliza can i have my hoodie back

**eliza <333** : no

**horsefucker <3: ** pleeeease

**eliza <333:** nooo its rlly comfy and my dad is interrogating me about u rn so i’ll get bac

k to you later

**horsefucker <3: ** :-( okay love u eliza

**eliza <333:** love you too, herc. 

~~~

**_alexander damnilton changed the topic to: suicide squad? more like SUICIDAL squad am i right?? haha kill me_ **

**ang:** who the fuck let alex rename the group chat

john we’re all lookin at u buddy

**j money:** shockingly enough he’s not w me rn. he’s w eliza.

**alexander damnilton:** `;-) 

**j money:** alex ur still sick why aren’t you at ur apartment

**im an angel and everyone loves me:** he’s not with me? he’s with laf.

**baguette:** no he’s with herc

**brapp brapp:** no he’s with john????

**j money:** DID YOU FUCKING GO TO WORK ALEX

**a.ham:** … maybe

**j money:** alex go home. you need to rest so you can get over this sickness.

**a.ham:** youre supposed to be on my side

**j money:** go home, alex.

**im an angel and everyone loves me:** hey guys stop being so gay

**brapp brapp:** you guys remember this is a GROUP CHat

**j money:** alex just texted me that he’s on his way home. laf hes coming to our place, sorry. 

**brapp brapp:** hes basically leslie knope

**im an angel and everyone loves me:** LITERALLY!!!!

**ang:** alex needs to stop working so hard hes gonna work himself to death i swear

**j money** : i know :( he needs to relax sometimes im rlly worried about him

**brapp brapp:** hey guys i think alex is still in the gc

**baguette:** wait 

john

is alex coming to our place

WHAT

I LEAVE TO MAKE FOOD FOR LIKE THREE MINUTES

**j money:** yeah im sorry laf :-( i dont want him to have to go home alone bc he doesnt have a roommate

**baguette:** fine but um. i should probably put clothes on. 

**j money:** yeah

**baguette:** what do u want for dinner john

**j money:** i have a protest thing so i wont be home until like nine

**baguette:** … what do you want for dinner 

**j money:** pasta

with no snails this time

also can u make alex some chicken soup?

**baguette:** oui oui

**j money:** ok will u let alex in hes here

**baguette** : i suppose

**a.ham:** john in so cold what the fuck

**j money:** hi “so cold what the fuck” im dad

**_ang has removed j money from the conversation_ **

**_a.ham added j money to the conversation_ **

**_brapp brapp removed j money from the conversation_ **

**_im an angel and everyone loves me added j money to the conversation_ **

**im an angel and everyone loves me:** i get the last word

**brapp brapp** : fuck u lizzie

**im an angel and everyone loves me:** wow i cant believe how nice my boyfriend is u guys

**j money** : WAIT WHAT

**a.ham:** WHAAAT

**ang:** hold up whatthe FUCK

**baguette** : um

????

**_i am an angel and everyone loves me_ ** **has left the conversation**

**_brapp brapp_ ** **has left the conversation**

**~~~**

**horsefucker <3: ** well

um

we’re out now? i guess

**eliza <333: ** yea sorry 4 putting u on the spot 

**horsefucker <3:** its ok !!

**eliza <333** : is it tho? i feel bad bc i didnt ask u about it first and then like we left the gc and i feel terrible about it

**horsefucker <3** : come to my apartment. we can talk it over and then chill.

**eliza <333** : herc u dirty bastard

**horsefucker <3:** I MEANT LITERALLY CHILL LIKE WE COULD LAY AROUND ON THE COUCH AND MAKE OUT AND CUDDLE

**eliza <333:** i know. i’ll be there in like, twenty minutes. love you. 

~~~

**angel bf:** hows the thing going

**john:** go to sleep

**angel bf:** is it goin well ??

**john:** yeah. i’ll be home in like, an hour. okay. love u.

**angel bf:** tell laf thank u for the soup

**john :** u can tell them urself

**angel bf:** no i cant im asleep

**john:** i love you im gonna finish my speech thing

~~~~

**_ang_ ** **added** **_brapp brapp_ ** **to the conversation**

**_brapp brapp_ ** **added** **_i am an angel and everyone loves me_ ** **to the conversation**

**brapp brapp:** so uh. eliza and i have been together since like. halloween?

**j money:** that was 4 months ago? u didnt even tell laf?

**i am an angel and everyone loves me:** yea we kind of appreciate havin private lives. obviously unlike any of you guys who share literally everything with us.

**brapp brapp:** calm down lizzie

**i am an angel and everyone loves me:** can i add peggy

**ang:** uh…… this chat is a lil adult 4 baby peggs

**_i am an angel and everyone loves me_ ** **added** **_AND PEGGY_ ** **to the conversation.**

**AND PEGGY:** wh y 

**ang:** ELIZA I TOLD YOU NOT TO ADD HER

**i am an angel and everyone loves me:** dont kick her shes already the most polite in the group chat

**baguette:** IM OFFENDED

**brapp brapp:** hey :-(

**i am an angel and everyone loves me:** except herc 

**brapp brapp:** thats my girl

**i am an angel and everyone loves me:** nevermind

**brapp brapp:** ur mean

**i am an angel and everyone loves me:** what the fuck even IS brapp brapp. what does it mean. come clean, hercules.

**herc ! <3:** is that better

**i am an angel and everyone loves me:** EXPLAIN IT THO I REALLY WANNA KNOW

**herc ! <3: ** ok when i did my first sewing class at the cultural center they were like “okay everyone give us an introduction in a style of music” and i didnt know how to start it so i said “brapp brapp i am  hercules mulligan” and it kinda stuck.

**i am an angel and everyone loves me:** aw aw thats adorable now im happy

**herc ! <3: ** i love u. come closer.

**baguette:** LOOK HOW CUTE THEY ARE

[LAMS.JPG]

**herc ! <3: ** NOT AS CUTE AS US

[IMG_1986]

**j money:** excuse you herc. alex and i are the alpha cute couple?

**a.ham** : i agree we’re the cutest ever

**j money:** true. 

**ang:** all in all. my qp and i are the cutest. so.

**baguette:** u guys are making me miss adrienne :-(

**j money:** awe laf cmere join us 

**herc ! <3: ** r u guys having a threesome

**j money:** NO OH MY GOD

theyre joining our snuggle pile

**a.ham:** lafayette is sucha big sweetheart tbh

**AND PEGGY:** i dont want to hear it im 17 and lonely

**_a.ham_ ** **changed the topic to** **_john made me cry because he tickled me so hard_ **

**j money:** it was hilarious

wasnt it laf

**baguette:** he punched me in the face, john.

**j money:** exactly

**a.ham:** im sorry laf blame john

~~~

**j money:** i AHET thomas jefferson why is he so pretentious

**a.ham** : AT LEAST YOU DIDNT ROOM WITH AARON BURR IN YOUR FRESHMAN YEAR

YOU WERE SO LUCKY

YOU GOT LAF

**baguette:** yeah but i had to deal w/ george lol

**herc <3:** AT LEAST YOU GUYS DIDNT HAVE FREAKINGI SAMUEL SEABURY

OH MY GOD

HES EVEN MORE PRETENTIOUS

AND HE TRIED TO FIGHT ME?>??

AND HE ALSO TRIED TO JOIN THE FOOTBALL TEAM

LMAO 

WHAT A LAUGH

**i am an angel and everyone loves me:** burr stole my phone at a party last year and i came back to being logged into his facebook with at least 20 pics of theodosia saved to my phone

**~~~**

**herc ! <3: ** can i change my name back now

**i am an angel and everyone loves me:** u can when u come over 2 my house

**herc ! <3:** what do i get in return

**j money:** DONT SEXT IN THE GROUP CHAT OH MY GOD

~~~

**j money:** guys help alex is tweeting sonnets about my ass again

**a.ham:** AND YOUR WATERMELON SHAMPOO

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have made a terrible mistake


End file.
